Thursday, 19 March 2009

• My hearts hurts today

  Have you ever been so burdened by something that you can literally feel your heart aching in your chest? As I write this, my heart is aching for the people of Thailand. I am working on a research project on Thailand, in preparation for going. The things I've read are not new to me, they're just fresh reminders of why the Lord is calling me to go.
  
  I want to share with you something a friend of mine wrote years ago, that describes what is going on in my own heart. I don't think I could even begin to put it better.
  
  

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  "My heart hurts today.  I want to reach out and shake the lost into a realization of the love of Christ...but I cannot.  I want to rip off the blindness that has trapped them in a world of lies and doubt.  I want to pry open their eyes in order for them to look upon the face of the One that longs to hold them to Himself.
  
  My spirit bursts with vision and passion for the Lord and His people.  Just as He spilled blood for them, I spill tears.  I contain but a glimpse of the true desire He feels for them. I taste but a drop of the hunger He feels for them.  His precious ones.  His people.  Why do I not run to them?  Why can't I speak to them?  Why can't I love them as He first did?  He waits.  He watches. 
  
  He puts the fire beneath my feet to run to them. He perfects my words to speak to them, and He...yes...He...moves me with compassion for their salvation.  Their eyes are deep.  They are dark and glazed.  Look at them...look into the eyes of a child without a future. Despair. Hopelessness.  This child is screaming...She is begging...."YOU! Yes...YOU!  Come to me.  Tell me of this God that loves you. I am afraid. I am lost.  Where is the hope?  Where is the truth?  Come show me this love."  And yet...I remain.  I wait upon the Lord who is the Author, Painter, Creator, and Father of who I am. He knows. He is the one that has placed this passion within me...the drive to go.
  
  The reigns that hold me become tighter around my neck as I fight the passion and zeal with wisdom and maturity.  When the day comes, I will bolt out of my racing block with enough strength and drive to go until the very end.  I will not stop.  I will not slow.  They are waiting.  As much as I long to shake the lost and cry out for their ignorance...I do not. Instead, I kneel.  I bow and I cry out to the One who can save.  He will.  He chose me...and through me...He will."
  

  
  written by Jennifer Sena
  

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  This is a picture of what is going on in my heart. I long to go - I am just waiting on the Lord to provide a way!
  
  I currently have 51% of my budget raised. This is double what I had last week - thank you for praying and giving! Please continue praying and also asking the Lord if He would have you give.

  
  www.journeyofavagabond.com
  
  

  • 7:22 PM
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